2025~2. All Fours

Miranda July. 2024.

You don't have to read very far into this book to recognize it is a train wreck ahead.  I didn't know exactly what type of a train wreck, but the author's ability to write with forbordence (which apparently isn't an actual word, but should be).  The foreshadowing is intense, if cloaked in mystery.  The writing is exquisite and enthralling.  I could not look away, despite the horror of the self-centered narrator-protagonist.  Without spoilers, it is hard to describe her midlife crisis related choices.  Even being in her head since it was written in the first person and her momentary glimpses of insight into the damage she was leaving in her wake, it as hard to understand her choices and impossible to find compassion--even when the strings of hardship from her life were woven together to explain how she got where she was.  Mostly, she demonstrated a level of narcissism that I found unsympathetic at best and often irritating, even infuriating.  The sex is explicit and tawdry, but the writing of it is alluring. I don't know quite what to do with the recommendation here, since I was captivated, have been thinking about it for a few days since finishing it, have talked to multiple people about it, and had a strong reaction to the content of it and yet at the same time, I can't recommend it because the character is so completely unlikeable, but in that complex way that narcissists can be charming and convincing, making their choices seem acceptable.  But, it is  novel!   So, do I really not recommend a book because I had such a visceral response to a made-up character?  The answer is yes, I really can not recommend a book because I just didn't like the main character, despite the quality of the storytelling and writing.  Finally, it feels like the author has a clear agenda to justify, even glorify, the choices made by the narrator.  Maybe I am reading more into this, maybe not, but unlike similar books (Normal People comes to mind), sometimes it felt like there was a lack of awareness by the author of what was playing out and a little too much emphasis on how avant-guard and "ultramodern" the situation is.  At one point towards the end, the narrator is proselytizing about her newfound lifestyle in a way that only a newly born-again believer can, trying to convince others that they have found the secret answer to the meaning of life, and it is hard to tell if the author is poking fun of the narrator or is indeed preaching this to the reader.  Does this add to the complexity of the novel? Maybe.  But did it make me wonder if I just got sucked into reading a really long piece of propaganda? Yes, yes it did.

P.S. I marked this as "romance," even though it isn't a romance, just because of the explicit sex scenes that as stand alone sections would appeal to folks in those who love a good erotic novel.
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Not recommended. 
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